There is a Hope

There are Demons that come at you as lies.
Lies come at you looking to make a comfortable new home all day, every day.

You’ve gotta protect yourself (we’ll get to that next), and
you’ve gotta clear house (we’ll get to that next after next)

But first I wanted to pause a moment to talk through what some of those lies actually look like. I’ve posted artwork that fairly represents what I think is going on. . .   You, all alone, with this horrible ugly thing speaking into your ear.  The voice might not sound ugly: it could sound like you, or your mom, an aunty, or a teacher, or a complete stranger you overheard at the store.  You hear this whisper, and you start to believe it and start to make it your own. Perhaps you start to use it to define your yourself, as others are using it to define you. You start to use it to explain and justify your limitations. “I’m not that smart, I can’t do that math.” Or “I’m not handsome enough to be attractive to that kinda gal.”

They are accusations, or even sound like a ‘statement of fact.’
Sometimes they come with absolutely nothing to back them up. . . completely out of the blue.
Sometimes they have a hint of truth, and that allows it to sting or stick.
Sometimes it’s the complete opposite of what is true, but it works to break down what you thought was solid. ‘You are such a fat cow’’ when in fact you are fit and healthy.
Sometimes it’s a suggestion to take action. . . ‘You should just kill yourself; it would be a relief for your family.’

mham-post-2-lies
Lies

I attached a couple of pieces of artwork to the post to make my points here. (Please read the backstory later in the post for info about the artist.)  The first piece shows a girl and a demon whispering in her ear. The lies floating around her are examples of the words and attacks that are coming at her. I think the position of the demon, kinda over and to the side, is spot on. It can come along side, weigh you down, whisper in your ear.
“No one likes you”, “Loser”, “Weirdo”, “Friendless”, “Pig”, “Stupid”.

The lies can take on a lot of forms, and we’ll dig into some specific examples in the next couple of posts.

 

 

But I don’t want to focus just on the lies today. I want to call out the fact that there is a HOPE that is so much bigger than the lies. There is a way through all this, no matter where you find yourself. There is a light that sends all the darkness fleeing.

mham-post-2-truth
Hope

I want to introduce the second piece of art I posted. This one fairly represents the feeling of ‘lightness’ that comes when the weight of the world is lifted off your shoulders.  That lightness feeds on itself; when you dissolve one lie you get more confidence in going after the next one, which makes that next success more likely, and so on. You get lighter and lighter, just like you can get darker and darker if you let the lies pile on.  You are never static and constant; you are either “moving” lighter or darker with every step taken and word spoken.

This second drawing is ‘hope and positive.’ It is possible. I’ve been there, and it’s nice. Am I there all the time? No.  But I know I’ll get back there soon, and I’m leaving breadcrumbs and taking notes so I can help other folks get there with me. I’ll share what I know.

I know how that return journey starts;
It’s a simple step; believe that there is hope.
Hope that the future looks better than the present.
Hope that the situation isn’t as bad as it seems right now.
Hope that YOU aren’t as bad as you seem right now.
Hope that there are love and kindness in the air around you, waiting for you to breath it in.
All it takes is being open to the possibility of there being hope.

If you have that hope as a possible bright spot, then you have enough to take the next step.
We can start to dig in to what you hear and what you believe, and we shall build a way to inspect, and reconstruct, from the foundation up.
Today – imagine the hope, and remind yourself that lies are lurking, waiting to be discovered and set right.

 

Behind the Scenes

My daughter came to me one day and said, “I drew this after listening to some of the stuff you guys were recording. This is the picture I saw, and then I spent a while on the internet coming up with all the words and phrases. Now I feel kinda icky. So, yeah.”

We were startled. (and happy that the stuff she wrote wasn’t her own, but rather off the Internet)  and we asked her to do a follow-up image that shows the positive side of things.

I would have selected these pieces to represent my point, even if I did not know the artist. I’m not bragging when I say that. (I AM bragging when I say, ‘OMGosh, she’s an amazing artist. And have you seen her latest piece? Here, I’ve got a picture…..’)

Can’t help it. I’m a proud parent. It’s what we do.

 

 

Take Back Your Truth

“Evil will never tell you how good you are, how strong you are, or what a difference you can make to improve the world.
Evil despises your capacity to love, and your potential for good, which promotes hope, and hope makes it harder to control us with fear.”
Stacey iBold Stibbards

We work as a team, my wife and I. Sometimes, on longer posts like this one, the ideas and the heart are hers, while the word selection and sentence structure is mine. This is one of those cases. I’m hoping that my contribution doesn’t get in the way of her ideas coming through, or prevent you from seeing her heart.

As we wrap the old year and start the new one, it’s a splendid time to think back through some of what has hung you up this year. I encourage an additional pause to consider how your thoughts might be trying to harm you, and how you might be controlled by the lies you believe. We’ve come to refer to those things that whisper lies in your ears, and which try to plant thoughts in your head, as “demons, devils, and flying ghost monkeys.”   (We both hate the Wizard of Oz, and especially the flying monkeys. When I picture something attacking my mental health, it looks like those little buggers, but a little “ghosty.”)

Those voices might take on the personality of people in your life today, or people that spoke into your life decades ago. Those offhand comments from aunts or adults when you were a kid are a great example; “He’s not too bright, is he?” “She can’t be an author because she’s not a reader.”
The lies arrive small and perhaps un-noticed or as a momentary sting.
But if they ‘take root,’ they can grow and fester and become debilitating.

There is freedom for you to find by exposing the truth. The heaviness that weighs you down can be lifted when you shine a light on the situation. Bad stuff hates getting exposed and hates the light of truth shining on it. (Ever turn on the lights in the kitchen and stuff scurries a zillion directions? If not, you’ve never lived in Florida.)

My wife started digging into the lies in her life 8 years ago. Your results may vary, but she keeps finding things buried out there. Even now it’s an ongoing discovery process.
I want MY truth.
Not my parents’ or grandparents’ truth.
Or the voice of family, friends or strangers.
I don’t want what is popular and normal.
Nor do I want success, as defined by the world, just so I’ll look successful.

Sometimes it’s as simple as asking yourself a question; ‘Do I really hate cats?’. That led my wife to discover that her Grandmother had a bad cat experience as a child, and she passed down her ‘cat hatred’ to her children and grandchildren.  Now we have two cats; one she loves and one that loves her. But she doesn’t hate either one.

Sometimes the truth takes a little more digging; “why did I put down my pen when I was 15 and planning on being an author?” That led her to a really exciting conversation with God over a pile of dirty laundry a few years ago.

We are all dealing with some pretty ugly demons, but we don’t have to believe everything they say. I encourage you to spend a little time getting ready to introduce a new way of thinking that will equip you for a battle.

Your future does not look as bleak as those cagey bastards (the demons, devils and flying ghost monkeys) want you to believe.

Find your truth, and it will change your life. This New Year’s let’s re-solve the solution to an age old problem; let’s change our perspective, change our solution, and walk along as a better ‘YOU.’

Lies come at you like sneaky little things or sometimes big overwhelming things. They are demonic and deadly, so treat them that way.

A letter from the past and a quote from Carrie Fisher got me to thinking. . .

Link to the video that explains it all . . .

I found a letter, I wrote myself like a time capsule it was dated May 1990. I was traveling back from a solo trip to London with a layover in Reykjavik, Iceland. I sat in on the Sugar Cubes recording a music video in the bar of the hotel, yet that didn’t even make it into the letter. Lol.

I was inspired as well by an interview I watched of the late great Carrie Fisher, where she said …. “You are only as sick as your secrets” it got me thinking. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.

My 21-year-old self knew who I was supposed to be, but I got lied to along the way. I have been kicked around by circumstances in 2016, (and 15, 14, 13, to be honest) to the point that I’ve kind of been hiding out from everyone. Hiding in secret with my shame of so much failure and the fear of what everyone will think if they knew my demons call me a loser, but I’m coming back fighting. I’m going to deal with the lies that derail me and make me sick. Head on. Gloves off. Take no prisoners and show no mercy.

Care to join me?

“You don’t hate, your demons do!”

“You don’t hate, your demons do!”
Charlie Monroe

Who are you? What are you filled with today?
Light or death?
You decide to cut your demons off by not feeding them with the very thing they need… your slow painful death in the form of defeat, loneliness, woundedness, rejection, sadness, anger, depression, sickness, offense, judgement, shame, fear, guilt, unforgiveness, bitterness, jealousy, resentment, disappointment, broken heartedness, revenge, abandonment, hurt, worthlessness, unloved, until there is nothing left of you, and you operate just like the one trying to kill your heart and soul their goal is hopelessness. So wake up and take it all back! They have no right to any of you!
Being without hope makes you the walking dead! It’s the demon apocalypse. STAND UP to them. Expose their lies, and that is the truth that has the power to set you free.
I love you Sweets! I just hate your demons to the moon and stars and back.
no hope

Don’t let the Sun go down on me…….

Even Elton John talks about the lies of his Demons, Devils, and Ghosts!  I love this song even more now.  Read the lyrics and then listen to the live version of this song with George Michael, it is brilliant.  The Demons are liars, Pull A 180 and find your truth!  They are scared to death, you will figure out, you are a powerhouse!!  Love ya, Sweets

 

ddfgm

JUMPED!

Exposing the Lies of our Demons, Devils & Flying Ghost Monkeys

DDFGM - #6For those of you who wonder…..What happen to Stacey? Our freaking family JUMPED and walked away from 90% it was like a Oprah episode, but no Dr. Phil at the end of the show and all 5 of us came out better, but we had to have the courage to JUMP and we all did. Our life changed and we don’t miss a thing we walked away from. It gave a fresh perspective and new eyes to a bunch of lies we believed about stuff and how it was suppose to serve us in some way, but it didn’t even begin to serve us until we got rid of almost all of it. We are not the same because we JUMPED….Then we set out to find what we love to do…each of us, knowing we had a gift you cant label because it does not look like anything else because…

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Mental Health Awareness Month Kickoff

Hope

“Evil will never tell you how good you are, how strong you are, or what a difference you can make to improve the world.

Evil despises your capacity to love, and your potential for good, which promotes hope, and hope makes it harder to control us with fear.”

  Stacey iBold Stibbards

This month I encourage you to be mindful of how your thoughts might be trying to harm you, and how you might be controlled by the lies you believe. I’ve come to refer to those things that whisper lies in your ears, and which try to plant thoughts in your head, as demons, devils, and flying ghost monkeys.  (I hate the Wizard of Oz, and especially the flying monkeys. When I picture something attacking my mental health, it looks like those little buggers, but a little “ghosty.”) Those voices might take on the personality of people in your life today, or people that spoke into your life decades ago. Those offhand comments from aunts or adults when you were a kid are a great example; “He’s not too bright, is he?” “She can’t be an author because she’s not a reader.”

The lies arrive small and perhaps un-noticed or as a momentary sting. (“Did she mean that I usually don’t dress nicely when she said that the outfit I was wearing today was flattering?”)  But if they take root, they can grow and fester and become debilitating.

There is freedom for you to find by exposing the truth. The heaviness that weighs you down can be lifted when you shine a light on the situation. Bad stuff hates getting exposed and hates the light of truth shining on it. (Ever turn on the lights in the kitchen and stuff scurries a zillion directions? If not, you’ve never lived in Florida.) .

I started digging into the lies in my life 8 years ago. Your results may vary, but I keep finding things buried out there, so it’s an ongoing discovery process.

I want MY truth.

Not my parents’ or grandparents’ truth.

Or the voice of family, friends or strangers.

I don’t not want what is popular and normal.

Nor do I want success as defined by the world just so I’ll look successful.

Sometimes it’s as simple as asking yourself a question; ‘Do I really hate cats?’. That led me to discover that my Grandmother had a bad cat experience as a child, and she passed down her ‘cat hatred’ to her children and grandchildren.  Now I have two cats; one I love and one that tolerates me; but I don’t hate either one.

Sometimes the truth takes a little more digging; “why did I put down my pen when I was 15 and planning on being an author?” That led to a really exciting conversation.

We are all dealing with some pretty ugly demons, but we don’t have to believe everything they say. I encourage you to spend May getting ready to introduce a new way of thinking that will equip you for a battle, for your future that does not look as bleak as those cagey bastards; the demons, devils and flying ghost monkeys, want you to believe.

Find your truth and it will change your life. Mental Health month should be about checking in on yourself and maybe walking away with a new perspective that makes you better.

There is hope, no matter what you might hear or believe.

#unloadthedemons   #mentalhealth  #mindfulness #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth