Mental Health Awareness Month Kickoff


“Evil will never tell you how good you are, how strong you are, or what a difference you can make to improve the world.

Evil despises your capacity to love, and your potential for good, which promotes hope, and hope makes it harder to control us with fear.”

  Stacey iBold Stibbards

This month I encourage you to be mindful of how your thoughts might be trying to harm you, and how you might be controlled by the lies you believe. I’ve come to refer to those things that whisper lies in your ears, and which try to plant thoughts in your head, as demons, devils, and flying ghost monkeys.  (I hate the Wizard of Oz, and especially the flying monkeys. When I picture something attacking my mental health, it looks like those little buggers, but a little “ghosty.”) Those voices might take on the personality of people in your life today, or people that spoke into your life decades ago. Those offhand comments from aunts or adults when you were a kid are a great example; “He’s not too bright, is he?” “She can’t be an author because she’s not a reader.”

The lies arrive small and perhaps un-noticed or as a momentary sting. (“Did she mean that I usually don’t dress nicely when she said that the outfit I was wearing today was flattering?”)  But if they take root, they can grow and fester and become debilitating.

There is freedom for you to find by exposing the truth. The heaviness that weighs you down can be lifted when you shine a light on the situation. Bad stuff hates getting exposed and hates the light of truth shining on it. (Ever turn on the lights in the kitchen and stuff scurries a zillion directions? If not, you’ve never lived in Florida.) .

I started digging into the lies in my life 8 years ago. Your results may vary, but I keep finding things buried out there, so it’s an ongoing discovery process.

I want MY truth.

Not my parents’ or grandparents’ truth.

Or the voice of family, friends or strangers.

I don’t not want what is popular and normal.

Nor do I want success as defined by the world just so I’ll look successful.

Sometimes it’s as simple as asking yourself a question; ‘Do I really hate cats?’. That led me to discover that my Grandmother had a bad cat experience as a child, and she passed down her ‘cat hatred’ to her children and grandchildren.  Now I have two cats; one I love and one that tolerates me; but I don’t hate either one.

Sometimes the truth takes a little more digging; “why did I put down my pen when I was 15 and planning on being an author?” That led to a really exciting conversation.

We are all dealing with some pretty ugly demons, but we don’t have to believe everything they say. I encourage you to spend May getting ready to introduce a new way of thinking that will equip you for a battle, for your future that does not look as bleak as those cagey bastards; the demons, devils and flying ghost monkeys, want you to believe.

Find your truth and it will change your life. Mental Health month should be about checking in on yourself and maybe walking away with a new perspective that makes you better.

There is hope, no matter what you might hear or believe.

#unloadthedemons   #mentalhealth  #mindfulness #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth

“Good does not Harm and Evil does not Care”

We all have the same enemy to each of our souls. We need to get on the side of Life, Love, and Peace. We all need to stand together against the one thing set out to devour us all with …Death, Hate, and Fear.

“Good does not Harm, and Evil does not Care.”

Before things get any worse can we just have a global time out? Ponder for a moment our perspective on life and death, and which side we are on. those Demons we have invited in, (side note …did you not see cult classic ‘The Lost Boys’?  If that movie taught you anything it was you never invite a vampire in your home.) same with demons into your head. Those shady bastards lie to get us to do some pretty questionable things that we are hushed and told by those same demons why we are just in walking it out, to serve them. They only mean to manipulate us to help feed them with the fear and agony that they survive and thrive on.
Expose the lies of your demons, devils or flying ghost monkeys whatever you call them. I love this video;  just a peek into what our Truth should be.

Truth is Life….Death is the Lies that we believe.
Make up your own mind;  it will surprise you what you find out, I promise.
‪#‎Globaltimeoutfromthedemons‬ ‪#‎exposingthelies‬ ‪#‎ddfgm‬ ‪#‎pulla180‬


Black as night……….

stacy heart.jpg


When your heart feels as black as night….assume you are being lied to….your heart may just be a little blue, and that’s ok… it is the circumstance that surrounds you that feels as black as night. Expose the lies you believe and it will change everything and allow the light to fill the darkness….don’t lose hope, this is temporary no matter what the lies tell you. Love you Sweets pass it on to someone who needs it today.
‪#‎hopeforafuture‬ ‪#‎thisistemporary‬

My Demons Wanted This To Be A Suicide Note

stacey - back


I have been fighting to survive a Supernatural storm. Actually, it’s more like a monsoon. And it’s not been a single storm, but an entire ‘strung together’ season. In fact, that season has lasted three or four years instead of just a single season. Oh, and it has gotten worse recently. I grew up with real hurricanes and thought I could get through pretty much anything. Even when dealing Supernatural situations, I always had this amazing faith in God; that the storm would calm, and the sun would come streaming through. I’d comment on the silver lining, and move on. Everything worked out in my favor.  Not this time: it was a monsoon. An entire new kind of storm, and it raged on and on, in waves. Torrential rains pound me with little or no relief. Floods almost drown me, and then recede. Only to come racing back trying to catch me unaware. I gasp for air and I wonder if this time the clouds will part and the sun will appear. The water rises, the wind picks up, and my hopes are crushed. This storm has tried to kill me, and it is still raging.

Like I said before, it hasn’t always been like this. I was God’s favorite; I knew it, and I lived it. I had this HUGE faith, and I loved sharing it. I was my best and most beautiful when I operated in my gifts, and the greatest of all of them was an unwavering faith that God simply adored and loved all of us. Period. I told everyone of this amazing love that was always FOR them. I guess you could say my heart has always been to be a “Rainbow” for everyone around me. A rainbow the way Maya Angelou describes them; an encourager and someone that lifts people up when they are down. I had a way to speak life into folks. On top of that, I knew the demons that people dealt with, having encountered my share. I knew how they operated. I knew how they lied. I knew how they strived to steal and kill. I knew how to help people over come after hearing the rumors of death that their demons whispered. I knew how to fight them, actually, and I was really good at it.

So what changed? I embarked on a huge adventure, which itself was an enormous leap of faith. (A ‘jump’ if you listen to Steve Harvey.) Actually, it wasn’t the fault of the adventure, but it was sort of related. Our adventure consisted of selling everything we had to fund a couple of years on the road, during which I would speak and write about this amazing love and faith that had sustained us. My mistake, in retrospect, was to start excluding God from the stories I was telling. I didn’t want to be branded ‘Religious’, and have my message thrown out. So I reduced, or in some cases eliminated, the role that God played in my stories. He went from being the source to having little or no role in the amazing things that I talked about. I was trying to make myself more ‘marketable’ by avoiding the ‘God issue’, or so I thought. What actually happened was pretty insidious. As I spoke about God’s role and love less in my stories, I, myself, heard about God’s love for me less and less. Just the way my brain works, I guess. I gotta hear it for it to make better sense, then it sticks. But I wasn’t speaking about it anymore, so I wasn’t hearing it anymore. I can trace the first band of this extended monsoon season back to the day I decided to pull God from my stories. The winds started up just as my faith was not getting ‘fed’ and reinforced as much or as often.

I wound up getting beat down more and more by the storm. It raged, the water rose, and it tried to kill me or kill my hope. I felt more and more impacted by it as I had less and less confidence in the faith that I once wielded like a sword as well as a shield.  Where once I was frequently a ‘rainbow’ in people’s lives, now I was hearing whispers from the demons on my shoulder; “you aren’t a rainbow. Just look at you.” Where once I felt completely favored by God, and now I was asking, “God, do you believe what these demons are whispering as well?”  I was shaken to my foundation, and then my foundation was starting to fall apart. My own thoughts turned on me as well, it seemed. I heard myself saying things to and about me that I would NEVER say about someone else. It was hateful and hurtful, but it just rolled off my tongue so easily; shame, disappointment, failure were all clearly in focus. I could talk endlessly about this stuff.  They were right; I was no longer a “rainbow” for folks.

Once I agreed with that statement, they kicked it up a notch. They told me three things; first that I had NEVER really been a “rainbow” and nobody was every really encouraged by what I had told them. Second they told me I was at death’s door, and had some horrible disease or condition. Third, they tried to convince me that my family would be better off without me, and it was kinda selfish of me NOT to die at this point.  I started to agree with what they were saying. I had become estranged from friends and family, and I felt thay had just humored me before.  I had pains and aches that were never there before. I’ve gone entire weeks with the same headache. And when I thought about my family, I saw very clearly all the people that would rush to their support if only I wasn’t in the picture. It would be tragic, but it would be for their best in the long run. I saw it all so clearly.  I saw devastation, destruction and collateral damage all around, all with my fingerprints. I saw no path forward that included me.

But I remember a time when my demons were powerless. They would suggest the worst to me, hoping I would line myself up with them by taking the bait, but they were no match for the love and faith I had in God. I was once told I have never seen a mountain, because all the mountains look like mole hills to me. Years ago, when the surgeon looked into my eyes and said, “prepare to be a single mom because this cancer will kill your husband”, I did not take the bait. Those demons were hoping to dance and celebrate, and instead we got mad; I told them to piss off, and we responded with faith like a superpower. They were no match for what powered my life, and my husband was healed and set free from that death sentence. I remember that Superpower feeling, and I remember my response.

And yet, here I was; believing I was at death’s door, ready to surrender without a fight, because I believed the lies my husband and kids would be better off without me. I turned to various vices to distract me and perhaps make everything crashing around me hurt a little less. I am so tired, I reason. Nobody would blame me. It would all work out for my family, and that was the most important thing to me. If I was gone, the storm would stop for them, friends and family would reconnect and support them. It sounded like a good deal in my waterlogged state. I needed a ‘port in the storm’ yet only found rocks. I needed to catch my breath, yet only choked on more water. I needed dry clothes and to rest, yet I was getting dragged down by the constant weight of everything. I realized my coffin would be made of cardboard because of the financial state I had inflicted on my family, and decided I deserved nothing more.

It’s been almost five years of some crazy stuff, and I am trying to remember what the old me would have done before, when I wasn’t so lost and broken.  I am trying to remind myself how I used to get through this stuff. I try to imagine what I would say to someone I saw in my situation back when I could encourage people.  And that has started to work.  I decide that I’m of more use here than dead. I declare that God doesn’t need another angel in heaven. I decide that the best thing for my family is ME and not a fond memory. I am tired of being the target. I am exhausted. But I’m also now mad at having bought in to their lies for so long. I am pissed off at what has been stolen, and I am catching my breath. I am standing back up instead of rolling over. My demons; these liars that perch on my shoulder and whisper lies in my ears, shall soon tremble in fear of me. I hear the voice telling me to fight. It is faint, but I hear it above the whipping wind and the thrashing rain. I draw power from it, and I know that soon, I’ll be ripping the heart out of this storm. I shall turn every attack that I have been subjected to against my accusers, and their camp shall be destroyed. Because I am a Fucking Rainbow. And I am a storm killer at heart. I just forgot for a little while, that’s all.

So a little note directly to my demons is in order:

You won’t get away with this. Your lies shall be exposed and your strategies turned against you. Everything you used to disable me, I shall use to be even better for the next person I see that needs a rainbow, and a boat and dry clothes and safe harbor from their storm. I will be your worst nightmare, and you can look back at when you made the mistake of picking a fight with God’s favorite. He still loves me like no other, and I still have the superpowers He gave me. You have exposed your strategies, and leave me with a better understanding of how you operate, and an empathy for folks that are still mid-storm. I shall go forth and tell everyone I can that they, too, are God’s favorite, and that things look different when you know who you are. We shall all watch amazing things happen as lies get exposed and you demons tremble while we walk in our truth. So demons, Devils, and flying Ghost Monkeys. . . Watch as I get up and pull a 180


Little Moments….

Smile 20160316

One of the Little Moments that Fear tried to Steal

Fear can feel like it cost you everything, in a single moment or a zillion little moments. Here is an example of one little moment.

What if we said “Hello” and smiled at strangers more? What if we didn’t care if we seemed weird…or fill in the blank with whatever that thought of fear suggests, and which prevents us from reaching outside of ourselves to a stranger.

I met someone recently who shared that they had felt isolated and alone since moving to a new area almost a year ago. His impression was that the people were cold and unfriendly. Then he shared that a woman passing by in a store said, ‘Hello’ and smiled. He was startled because it had been so long since a stranger had acknowledged him.

I can’t stop thinking about how such a simple gesture made this guy feel better and affected his day in a positive way.  Not only his day but a week later it was still on his heart and he smiled as he shared the story.

So many of us are surrounded by people yet feel more alone and isolated than ever.  We should be on a mission to love humanity back to life.

For all of us who feel overwhelmed by the question, “What can I do?” Well, maybe it starts with a smile.

This guy who seems a bit shy and withdrawn over what life has handed him has a new and fresh perspective of… “What if I step out and just gave a smile? What could it do?” because he knows now what it did for him.

Just another day of learning how to use our super powers.

Together, we can turn this world around. Good always defeats evil in the end, we just have to stop listening to the evil.

Evil will never tell you how good you are, how strong you are, or what a difference you can make.

Evil despises your capacity to love, and your potential for good, which promotes hope. Hope makes it harder to control us with fear.

So start with the kindness of a smile and give freely. Be on guard, because evil is there always. It tries to steal that kindness by suggesting that you pick and choose who you are kind to. It will try to pass judgment on people that are ‘different’ and suggest you pass them by. So give freely, and randomly. Remember the people whose paths you cross are frequently not accidental; don’t miss an opportunity.

Smiles are free and unlimited until your last breath. I hope to die with a big smile on my face as the biggest “screw you” to the evil lined up against all of us; we’re all in this together.

Love ya Sweets